Stuck in indecision.

The first time I read about God spitting out something, it was lukewarmness. “So because you are lukewarm (spiritually useless), and neither hot nor cold, I will vomit you out of My mouth [rejecting you with disgust].” — Rev 3:16 I wondered why? I mean being in the middle ain’t so bad (that was my thought process) then one day I was having a talk with my older sister she told me, “Kecho, can you drink lukewarm milk tea?” I was like yuck! The thought just irked me out. Ever taken a sip of tea that has cooled down, it doesn’t even go down properly. This is the image that is etched in my mind whenever I get into indecision area code.

It’s normally two things I am battling:

• I don’t want to hurt people’ feelings.
• What will people think of me?

It’s an external force pushing me down rather than rising up. 2019 was something else, I felt God was kicking me out of this zone. What normally happens is rather than make the decision I just numb out and not think about it so I become a busy body on other things yet this one decision would have solved the problem by miles. It’s basically paralysis. Nothing moves, I am chasing my own tail, no abundant life whatsoever. I used to call it a “Jonah moment” but Jonah makes a choice he runs away. Indecision is different, it’s not doing anything not making a choice…it’s a form of disobedience, like delayed disobedience which is still disobedience. Towards the end of December, I start down to begin writing my second book, I asked God to show me His truths not my own because I didn’t want any unresolved issues to cloud this next book….yoooo! I wasn’t ready. Most indecision stems from a heart issue, there’s a misalignment between the reality and expectation this what breeds the stuckness. We feel alot, there’s actually a verse in the Bible about not trusting the heart,”The heart is deceitful above all things And it is extremely sick; Who can understand it fully and know its secret motives?” — Jer 17:9 The verse goes on to say that God examines the mind and heart, your thoughts are very key to God!

We are feelers, you will hear many people who are stuck say things like, “I feel… I think….I wish…” Such statements let one know that they have entered the emotional zone and this zone is trickier than a maze. If you don’t discern the root of these feelings they will control you into a numbness then silence.

Many people don’t want to dig down into their feelings because they will have to uncover some truths which they are not ready to deal with(fear) yet we are Spirit beings with a soul in a body.

God didn’t make a mistake by giving us souls, naaahhh! He doesn’t waste a thing! Your soul is your pilot and if one can’t steer it in the right direction, you will crush and burn. The key to dealing with our emotions is to acknowledge them, find the root cause and then let it go; where we get stuck is at the beginning ACKNOWLEDGING THEM! I have sat with angel mums who are so quick to tell me, “Kecho, I am fine. What else can I do? The baby died, the baby died.” I always smile at them because this is a typical mind protecting itself from pain. What I normally do is give that person time, why? Because emotions have to find a way out, it’s how they operate. They have to be acknowledged, it’s not a bad thing to do so. “I am angry, I am sad, I don’t know why this happened, I am confused etc.” This is a good step because it gives one insight into the feelings, once that’s done then you can go on to ask why?how? Now what?get to bottom of it then get yourself a Bible verse even if it’s John 3:16 and counter that root issue. This is renewing your mind in the Word(the Truth) there’s nothing in this world you are going through that the Bible doesn’t have answers to. Then chew on that verse, when those thoughts come back(which they normally do) speak the Truth and now because you know the root you know what to speak to.(this is the letting go part) People don’t like this stage they would rather renew their mind in alcohol, extra martial affairs, shopping sprees,binge eating/watching etc, while these give momentarily satisfaction they more often than not cause more problems.

I encourage many of our angel parents to go for therapy sessions because most times we don’t even know what emotions we are feeling, we don’t know how to decipher them inorder to get the root cause, we all need a little help to become experts in ourselves. To imagine that we have spent over 16years of our lives learning about everything in this world from civic studies, mathematics, English, history, Bible study and whatever you went to learn in university and master in relation to your career yet you don’t know the nitty gritty details about your inner being; there’s a dishonesty looming. That’s why the numbers in suicides around the world depression(feelings not acknowledged), anxiety(not rooting the feelings) have gone up, the reality and expectations are not meshing.

I encourage us, especially those who feel alone, unheard, misunderstood, hurt to ask for help, a friend of mine says, ” the biggest step is asking for help” then be intentional about renewing your mind, God gave us dominion over all things: even your own mind!

#speakthetruth

Call Vessel Is Me 0787-837734/0758-236196 for therapy sessions.